-
Mammoth Getaway…don’t sweat the small shit
After spending 2 days with him i came to a conclusion Jeff is my therapist and a great friend. I don’t have any interests in him in a way that I did before. I don’t mind cuddling with him and stuff since he lets me haha and I don’t know if I consider myself his “fall back”. He was dating this girl who severly bruised his ego and he only told me which of course in response I called him a little bitch for ditching joanna’s potluck bc a girl hurt your heart. He said he wouldn’t have been good company and me being me I picked on him haha
We’re sitting in the lobby/living room chilling on our iPads doing our own thing. He tells me about the girls he met on eHarmony and what kind of girls he likes. funny thing is I don’t fit into that criteria. He like his girls plain with no make up and very Asian looking. But he refuses to admit these girls are VERY Asian looking. I mean fobby looking girls! He doesn’t like girls that wear heels and that take more than 30 minutes to get ready…things like that. What guy doesnt like a girl to doll up for him?!?! I think that just weird but to each is own soi guess opposites DO attract in this case. I don’t know why but I don’t see him with that type of girl. His arrogance and confidence doesn’t come out unless he wants to act that way. He really is smart and full of knowledge and all that bullshit, but he feels that he can be modest and cocky if he feels like it like it’s a switch of some sort. Sweet guy, but not the guy I’d like to see myself with anymore.
although…you think about it…would you kiss someone when you’re drunk just bc or is it that you had some little spark there? Im sure i was somewhat an attraction to him. Pretty cool guy…when I confessed my feelings for him he didn’t run away. I appreciate the fact that he talked things out with me to make me realize he’s not the guy I would want in my life. He has many flaws tat i have yet to see and i like what I seer on the surface. No guy has sat down and analyzed where theses confessions csne from and analyze it in a way he did. Love it! That is why he is my therapist. He opens up my mind and my eyes in a way that I didn’t think of or see.
“don’t sweat the small shit” is basically what he got out if me. I worry about everything that is unnecessary. He says it will eventually make me not wanna have fun and effect my life on how I see people. I told him about my past bfs and how 3/4 have been unfaithful and liars. I told him it prevents me from trusting a guy. Once the trust is broken it’s really hard for me to trust him again. If I end up ruling my mind on how very guy, the posssesiveness out of me will always dominate me and I will never be able to keep someone who genuinely loves me for me. I will assume that they are being unfaithful and I will never be happy.
How do i NOT sweat the small stufff though? Do I need to start being careless of other people? But that makes me who I am though. I guess holding on to shit that happened in the past effects my relationship with people now. I think the caring person in me needs to learn how to forget the useless crap. I can’t be overwhelmed by things that are silly. it will end up eating me up inside. If something happens and all of a sudden something like a friend not talking to me, I need to learn how to move on. Instead of trying to find out the reason, just move on bc in sure they have done. Stop trying to find out the “why” and say fuck it, oh well. I was fishing for a compliment with him asking how I did today on the slopes and he refused to give me a compliment. Instead he asked how I think I did. I told him I did pretty well on black diamond and didn’t have a problem with it as I thought I would. Why do I care what he thinks, I don’t know but I just wanted to hear it from someone who is very good I suppose. Hehe
This trip has been super fun and I can’t wait to hit up the slopes tomorrow. I’m there will be more talks on the rudevhome as well. =excited= -
So i’ve decided to make a change…i’m going to start blogging about the music events i go to and to start it off…
My Favorite DJ…Afrojack :D
Taken Memorial Day Weekend 2011 @Encore Beach Club, Las Vegas
-
I wish….
I wish it was easier for me to post on tumblr through my phone. For some reason, the option to post pics on tumblr is there anymore. I can do text, email, FB and twitter, but not tumblr. Poopie. I guess I can start off next month by updating this thing with my weekly EDM events. I hope I don’t fall into laziness.
There I posted something. Happy? -
censorship
“food turcks are like men. convenient, easy, a variety and you crave it BADLY at night”-5.13.2011
guess ive been “mis-representing” myself on FB according to my cousin. should i just block her and keep my thoughts and expressions still on blast? i need an outlet where i can freely talk so Twitter might be the way to go..? i like expressing myself with all the snide comments and thoughts i have. i told my cousin that the people i have on FB know that i’m not that kind of person degrading myself or anyone else for that matter. it was only intended for people to TAKE A JOKE…laugh a little. obviously my cousin didnt like it that she called me just to tell me “you are mis-representing the family by putting up these uncensored comments. it makes me want to delete you sometimes..really.” but i enjoy expressing myself. now i feel like FB is not letting me speak my mind :(
looks like if you want to know what dirty raunchy thinkgs i’m thinking, it will be on Twitter :D
-
-
-
.::Vegas Easter Wknd::.
-
Strutvenat Falls at Chantry Flats in Arcadia. This is why I hike :)
-
Aint it the coolest thing? I love gummi bears being in the Holiday spirit. Even they have Xmas trees!
-
These are a few of my favorite things… :D
